May 31, 2015

Fooled by Food

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Disclaimer – Before you jump into the masterpiece (err too much eh?) written below, here’s a look at the one of the life goals our author follows:

Buy me food make me food be food


How have you felt when your ice-cream scoop falls flat to the ground? Where even the 5 second rule can’t save it? When you animatedly open that amazing chocolate and you find it all soft and melted – worse case >> stuck to the wrapper? Oh and what about then when the Parle-G biscuit you just dipped in the tea, fell inside your tea-cup?

Poker Face

Dejecting isn’t it?

They say trust, once broken, is never repaired fully. Too many of us have placed our trust in someone (me-in>>FOOD), only to have it broken (with them - PUKES). And a hopeful species that we are, we give FOOD a second chance (and many more chances) to redeem themselves.

Most of the times, these second chances are taken, but often comes a heartbreak in store the nth time around too. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.

Welcome to my lala-land where I shower my unconditional love to food and what does it give me in return?

Ans. Energy

*in Senior Bachchan’s tone of voice – “Partially galat jawab”. Because food also gives:

1. Acidity
2. Gas
3. Loose motions
4. The worst of all – PUKE

I love food. I love eating food, seeing food, sniffing food, reviewing food, free food and all stuff with food in it. But then FOOD doesn’t love me as much as I do. Here’s a list of dejections (& rejections) that I & most of us face even after giving out our hearts & emptying pockets on our pseudo girlfriend FOOD:

1. Enchanting Aroma – That delicious aroma that food silently places in our nostrils, slurp, makes you hungry even if you had a truck full of food.

2. Fancy Names – You checked in at a place and ordered a fancy item and when it comes to the table, it tastes like crap (sometimes even after reading the description). You are just left wondering how it even made it to the menu.

3. Fridge – I followed my heart and it led me to the fridge. I sang songs to him that went like “Baby you light up my world like nobody else”. See so much I do for you my dear FOOD.

4. Daydreams – Occupying my thoughts all the time. Whilst in exams, travel, work, home (The Kal-Kya-Banau Syndrome?) Even when I share my skin color you come in! Insane!

Caramel

5. Cost in cinemas – Food is the most expensive things and if you ask me where, it has to be in the cinemas. Just why food? Y you betray me?

6. Ingredients – So many ingredients. Life is a combination of magic & Pasta. Plus the insane amount of cheese which goes into making it. *Burns Pockets *burns heart through calories too

7. Quotes:
Real love? Do you mean food?

#ReasonsWhyImSingle or #ImSingleBecause – I have food you know *turns around FOOD? Where you ran away?

Desserts & rewards seldom keep company – ofcourse who would keep a dessert waiting!

Flattery is the food of fools. Wait what? It’s the other way round FOOD is the flattery of fools. Love Fools.

Marry the one who gives you the same feeling like – the one you get when you see your food coming at a restaurant
 
Might Love much as lunch - Might
 
FOOD ever betrayed you? Me too! Share your weird experiences!

Onomatopoeically,
meow


This post is a part of Write Over the Weekend, an initiative for Indian Bloggers by BlogAdda.

12 comments:

  1. Hahahah! Funny and a good read! :D

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  2. Such a fun read. It's true that People who love to eat are always the best people :)

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  3. Such a fun and refreshing read....you sure have a lovely way with words and expressions :)

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  4. Haha Sherna that was a funny take on food, you made me believe that it was a character in your story and you were romancing with it soo much :) I agree with all your pointers as well in terms of the disappointment we get when somethings doesn't turn out right while at a restaurant or Cinema for that instance which is so damn expensive ;p

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  5. Hahaa. I share the same relationship with food as you do! It's so not fair. After devoting our lives to food all it gives back is tighter clothes and lighter wallets!

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  6. Such a lovely article. Its very innovatively written. I have a strong connection in this story

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  7. Loved the introduction and the vivid imagery that you displayed. Absolutely enjoyed the intention of this article.

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  8. Being a foodie, I get this passion for food totally. This one tickled my funny side :)

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  9. Funnylicious..ok, I have copyrighted the term..this happens when fun and food are brewed in the same pan, which you have done.I think there should be a Food Nobel prize for articles like these that bring joy to the readers..;)))

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  10. Hahahaha... Totally relatable! :-)

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  11. Wow! Changing your contact name on my phone to Foooooodie!:)

    Amazingly funny read!:)

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